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Lardle is the language of planet Lardle Lardle and consists of only one word: "Lardle". It degenerated to this point from the frequently traveling inhabitants' practice of loudly, slowly and emphatically speaking a few choice words of their own language while abroad. Meaning is conveyed by how loudly, slowly or emphatically the word is spoken, similar to the Martian Swahili term "boinga". Hence, although visitors to the world can rightfully claim to know all the words of the native tongue, it is frightfully difficult for anyone to actually know what they mean.

An exhaustive list would be incomprehensible and impossible to memorize, but here are some broad samples:

"Lardle lardle lardle" means "Which way to the train station?"

"Lardle lardle lardle" means "Where did you buy that ice cream?"

"Lardle lardle lardle" means "I would like to sleep with your wife".

The sign at the planet's main starport, reading in fifty-foot-tall letters "Lardle lardle lardle, lardle lardle lardle lardle, lardle lardle lardle lardle lardle lardle, lardle" roughly translates as "Tourists are advised to refrain from attempting to speak our language under any circumstances, unless they wish to be arrested for fooling around on a train with a tub of ice cream and someone's wife."